woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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