Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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