if any two of us come back from the bar and aren't getting laid we will systematically destroy everything in the kitchen
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
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