so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
