I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
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