I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
