I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
