Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
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