the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
