KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
is wine microwaveable?
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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