She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
