You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
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