Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Randomize
