She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize
