found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Randomize
