What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
