Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Randomize
