508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
you never un-have a 4some
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
