jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
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