I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
