We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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