i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
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