Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
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