I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
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Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
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stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
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