Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Randomize
