Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I just blew my weed a kiss
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
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