Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Randomize
