i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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