she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
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