yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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