best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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