Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Randomize
