ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
the day after is always just damage control
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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