just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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