new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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