I love black thongs
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
