it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Randomize
