are you so shy because you have an std?
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
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