your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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