So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
i dont even know how to be here
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
