It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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