I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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