I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Randomize
