DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
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