it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
Randomize