I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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