You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
