who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
