Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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