So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
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