WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Randomize